I put a rubber band around my upper arm. The post-gym pump will become more visible, and the veins will bulge. The circumference of my bicep is 37 centimetres. The dark orange rubber band fits tightly around the arm, shearing it, as I feel the blood flow down to my hand. I didn’t eat turkey or broccoli before. Now I weigh 61 kilograms. My aim is nearing something vaguely in the three number range. Bulking up began to feel like a pleasure.
As I’m writing this in February 2016, my shoulder has already hurt for a week. I need to start boxing. I send an email to a voice therapist because I want to masculinize my voice. The muscles in my neck feel tense. The Academy of Fine Arts is paying for my Calvin Klein boxers (Size M). The Hasselblad sends a signal to the flashlight which goes off. An object reflects the light from its body through the Hasselblad’s 80 millimeter lens into the camera’s sensor.
I’m awarded a grant for twelve months to buy protein powders. I mix the powder into a recovery drink, which becomes a 1500 calorie smoothie. I eat chicken. I weigh 80 kilograms. At home after the gym I do pushups to get more blood into my muscles. After measuring my bicep I immediately write down the centimeters. When I think about the photoshoot it is very similar to flexing in front of the mirror at the gym. After a good pump, flexing the muscles feels pleasing. In the studio pumping is more challenging because it has to be achieved with just the weight of the body. I attempt to stay in pump. It is kind of an ideal state.
I decided on a keepsake. It will be preserved and archived, hence the airtight container. I place a grey card in front of an object.